# My Little Shadow



## Darkabeus (Oct 7, 2010)

Ask yourself, ever had a pet that you most loved and have fond memories of Halloween? 

I have. His name was Shadow a black cat (Next to the pumpkin what better symbolizes Halloween than a black kitty). I loved him so much. When Halloween was close I would have a yearly joke at my wife's expense. The joke goes like this:

I would hold him in my arms and say:

Halloween is coming! Are you excited? Just remember to hold on the broom tight when you fly the night skies with your mother. My wife would just look at me like...you bastard! It always made me laugh. 

This year in January my little Shadow died of a sever asthma attack. I was working for a company that I really wanted a job in and in the end didn't get it. I put this place above my little kitty that I love very much. A mistake that I will never make again. I knew he was really sick and left for work with this feeling of dread that when I came home he would be dead. Its a guilt that haunts me to this day and I hope it haunts me the rest of my days. Yes I punish myself because I put this job over my little pet, my best friend and I hate myself for it! 

My Halloweens will never be the same from here on end,because of this little cat. As I write this my eyes are tearing up, because I miss him so much. I often relive that day saying if I just stayed home, if I put him above this job, and took him to the Vet instead of saying "He'll be ok just like always", if I had just followed my instincts he would still be alive to celebrate my favorite time of the year! But I didn't and he's gone. 

I remember seeing him at the vets on the cold, hard table and putting my hand over my mouth so that no one could hear me screaming! I couldn't believe what my eyes were seeing. My little furry friend...dead. I cried for many hours (this not being the most manly thing to do, but didn't give a crap!). 

With Halloween approaching I can't help but think about him. I loved him so much. One of my friends told me to go to a shelter and get another black kitty. But i cant replaced one of my best friends? 

When I received the ashes of my little Shadow and I spoke this eulogy:

"If I had known that on that day our time was near the end
I would have done things differently, my forever friend.
I would have stayed right next to you deep into the night
but I thought I'd see you in the early morning light.

And so I said "Good night" to you as I walked in through the door
never thinking of the time when I'd see you no more.
But if I had known that on that day our time was at the end
I would have done things so differently, my forever friend​
So my question is what pet do you remember that has passed on, that gives you fond memories of Halloween?


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