# Is it rude to have an "Adults Only" request?



## HallowYves (Jul 11, 2009)

There is absolutely nothing wrong with having an "adult only party".... matter of fact it seems that there are more and more adult theme parties these days. It's your party and it's important for you to enjoy yourself without having too worry about children running around getting hurt, or getting in the way of things... you already have the job to host it ... no need to make it more complicated.
And that's coming from a person whose a fanatic for kids.


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## Witch Hazel (Sep 6, 2008)

Each year we have an adults only party. We have two children & sometimes we have a party closer to Halloween for them. I don't think anyone should expect you to allow children there when you don't have children of your own. I don't think it is rude at all to say "adults only". I usually use a poem & there is a line in there about that (ie. live the kiddos @ home because it is too scary). I'll try & find the poem from last year and post it on here so u can see an example.


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## Rikki (Aug 14, 2006)

My regular party is an open house for my gym so I put "bring your friends - 18 and over only please!" on the invites. But there is a lot of alcohol and some things that just aren't appropriate for kids at my party. I want my party to be a time for adults to get back to that child-like fun that normally gets forgotten once college is over and they just can't do that if they have to drag their kids along. No one has ever complained or gone against my wishes. I do have a few people who can't get overnight babysitters and don't come, though.


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## Madame Leota (Sep 19, 2005)

Nothing wrong at all with wanting some adult social time and honestly, no one needs that more than the_ parents _of small children so I think you'll be fine designating the party as "adults only". Heck, when my kids were little I would have done almost anything for the chance to sit around and talk to another adult. I say go for it!


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## MassMax (Jul 20, 2009)

I don't see anything wrong with your concept of an adult only party. To avoid hurt feelings, it's just a matter of putting the proper marketing spin on things. Halloween night is devoted to the kids (as it should be), with all the costume prep, chaperoning, and candy distribution that entails. But your party is focused on enjoyment for the adults, so that after all the obligatory things they need to do for the kids, they can still remember that Halloween is FUN. You're not excluding anyone - you're embracing the poor, downtrodden parent, and offering them the chance to escape for an evening. The glass isn't half empty, it's...well, you get the picture.


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## Wyatt Furr (Aug 27, 2005)

I agree with all the above.
After a few years of friends bringing their kids, (who then they had to entertain), they never really enjoyed themselves. And the kids were bored.

So I added a nice note into the invites, along the lines of,
"If you want to explain to your kids why that man has a sheep attached to the front his pants,or why the woman is wearing a string and dixie cup bikini, bring 'em along."

If they want to come to your party ,they will find a sitter.
Parents do NOT want to answer questions like that.....


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## killerhaunts (Jan 6, 2010)

I whole heartedly agree! Do what makes you most comfortable. Any adult with a child will understand. I have a toddler and she HAS to get her hands on anything Halloween in the garage! She even tries to cry when we won't take her into the garage to see the bats and ghouls! I think it's your party and you need to be able to relax and get into the spirit ... my problem is that adults touch my stuff, too!!!!! and I don't like it!


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## mommyto3 (Aug 24, 2009)

It's not rude to have an adults only party! It seems from your post that you only have a few individuals that have children - if this is the case, there shouldn't be any worry on your part - they simply need to find a sitter, same as any other adults only party. Babies and toddlers are a lot of work and the adults just can't truly enjoy themselves if they little ones are around - I'm sure your guests with children will understand. 

A couple of thoughts...

Are you planning this on Halloween night (which is Sunday this year)? If so, adults with children may either (1) not come at all since they have to take the little ones out to TOT or (2) come late - which if it were me (and the majority of the population) have to work on Monday so I would probably decline the invitation all together.

Just my 2 cents.


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## OKHaunting (Sep 6, 2007)

We always include a "Sorry, but adults only!" statement on our save-the-dates and invitations... our house is not kid friendly, and I don't want me or parents to have to worry about them getting into something they should not. I tell all my friends with kids that, and most seem to understand and respect that. As long as they know far enough in advance, they can make plans for a babysitter.


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## natascha (Jul 21, 2004)

*Hereos and Villians invite help*

O.K I admit that I have borrowed or had help with my wording the past couple of years for my invites and I am looking for it again.

I do my invite as one full sheet af paper with the usual info: time, palce, what to bring etc. but usually have a paragragh or a poem to get the people to understand the theme is and what we would "like" you to try and base your costumes on.

This year we are doing Heroes & Villians, does Not have to be superhereos, could be firefighter, favorite teacher, your Mother etc. or Villians could be, not your favorite president, the grinch, the devil etc.

Please help with invite ideas, I am stuck!

Thanks


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## Dullahan (Aug 9, 2010)

No, its not your fault your friends have kids. If they want to come they have to find something to do with them for the night. End of Story.

I have been to Halloween Parties where people bring their kids .. and they suck. The kids get bored and cranky, someone always gets wrangled into Baby sitting them, and without fail they break something important. 

You'll have to deal with all that one day (as you said), but there is no reason to start now at your own party. 

One of my girlfriend's friends who she has known since they were kids is a real freakin B*tch and she went into some hissy fit telling me "Well if my kids can't come than I am not coming" this one time. I just looked at her and didn't say nothing but I am thinking "I don't like you anyhows, so it is what it is" Long story short, she ended up coming and her husbands parents watched the kids. A good time was had by all.


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## Dullahan (Aug 9, 2010)

.....................................


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## MHooch (Jun 15, 2007)

H-E-DOUBLE HOCKEY STICKS, no, it's not rude.

Your house, your party, you make the rules. Sometimes I think that people these days don't spend enough time away from their kids, and wind up taking them places that aren't appropriate. Back in the day there was a separation between adults and children, and I don't think that that is a bad thing. A simple "Adults only, please!" on your invite should be sufficient.

Boy, do I sound like an old f*#t!!!  LOL


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## v_gan (Aug 19, 2009)

Thank, everyone  I definitely think I'll be including "Adults only, please." on my invites. Hopefully there won't be any trouble.

I'm mostly worried about my _boyfriend_ thinking it's rude, since it's _his_ friends this is aimed at. But considering I'm the one spending all the money for our Halloween parties every year, I think I have a little more say in the matter


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## Frankie's Girl (Aug 27, 2007)

We've always told people that our party has scary or gross things not appropriate for children. 

We had one couple bring their kid even so (was under 2) and they were holding him or taking things out of his reach the entire time. 

Absolutely nothing wrong with saying your party won't be suitable for children. It's the clueless or the rude that you'll have to deal with if they still show up with little ones.


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## Radiorox (Aug 19, 2010)

We've had a bunch of Halloween All of them have been Adults Only. I've had ONE person get upset, throw a tantrum, come anyway and then tell me they were happy that the kiddies stayed at home.

If Halloween lands on Saturday, I like to do the party a week early so that the parents have a chance to do the trick or treating thing with the kiddies. 

So, not rude at all. Not all kids are well behaved and the last thing you want to do is piece together your prop after it gets wrecked. 

Jackz.


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## Bella LaGhostly (Aug 10, 2009)

Nothing wrong with making an "adults only" request - it IS your home and your party, and they can always choose to decline the invite.

However, I'd skip the part about how kids are "annoying" and "gross".


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## Grimm Halloween (Aug 24, 2010)

I don't think its rude... we are having a Halloween Party this year and we made it clear to not bring any kids.


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## Halloween Princess (Sep 23, 2008)

I have not included a statement about kids only, however everyone seems to choose not to bring their children. We only have a couple friends with kids but I think they see it as a night to let loose. There is a lot of alcohol, stairs in our house, and adults that act like kids...


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## Halloween Princess (Sep 23, 2008)

natascha said:


> O.K I admit that I have borrowed or had help with my wording the past couple of years for my invites and I am looking for it again.
> 
> I do my invite as one full sheet af paper with the usual info: time, palce, what to bring etc. but usually have a paragragh or a poem to get the people to understand the theme is and what we would "like" you to try and base your costumes on.
> 
> ...


I think you accidentally posted in the wrong place. I think you meant to start a new thread...


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## Jackielantern (Oct 31, 2005)

Halloween Princess said:


> ...... and adults that act like kids...


I busted out laughing since that seems to fit our bunch to a t.

I think you have your answer hands down.  We've never specifically said no kids on our invites but the talk leading up to our first parties let everyone no that they were not kid appropriate. (plus 15 yrs ago few of us had kids lol) We also try to accomodate parents by doing a couple of things. Never having the party on halloween night and starting them later. If a party doesn't start until 8:30 they are less likely to want to bring them. Also, it gives them time to get the kids settled and still get a decent costume on and over to our place.

Good luck with the party!


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## katshead42 (Aug 5, 2010)

It's implied there there are no kids allowed at our parties. I don't think that there is anything wrong with that.


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## snowbaby (Aug 9, 2010)

nothing wrong with that at all. I think it is good practice to put that on the invite to be clear.

We are doing an "Adult Only" party on the 30th and a Kid's party on the 31st.


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## printersdevil (Sep 7, 2009)

Not a thing wrong with this. We do have kids at ours, but most of them are family and it is not a problem. A couple of our close friends now bring their grandkids so they can enjoy the decor and craziness.

My problem now is that my 12 year old niece lives with us and she wants to have friends. We draw the line there.


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## The Red Hallows (Sep 21, 2009)

*As a mother with two kiddies, you are compeletly out of line.......................*

NOT! 

Seriously, I love it when I'm invited to 'adult' only parties. It's my time and I don't have to worry about the kids and get to enjoy myself knowing there are no other kids there. Kids add a different atmosphere to the parties too. 

Don't get me wrong, parties with kids can be fun, but adult only parties can be a great escape too. 

Go for it... adults only.....many will love the idea of free time without the kiddies...


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## selinamb (Sep 13, 2010)

We ALWAYS have adults only. We have alcohol and loud music and... well, we don't like it when our friends (or us!) end up being impromptu babysitters for other people's kids. 

In any case, I include child verbiage in our invitation poems.

*this is how we handled it last year*: 
"Call the sitter
Put the kiddies to bed
It's time for the grown ups
To raise the dead"

*This year:*
"Shadows stir in candle light
Best leave the children home this night"

I've also seen where people say, "Adults only. Children will be eaten."

I'd keep it light.


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## Darth Sparrow (Aug 25, 2010)

Here is the thing , if there where kids... the parents completely shift their attention to their kids and stop having fun. For example my wife and I dont plan to have kids but we have a niece who we spoil rotten. The last time her MOM (my wifes sister) came to the party, we said go a head and bring her since they come almost 2 hours from out of town. Well of course my niece was having one of her off day where she was just cranky, moody, didnt want to be away from mom, just wanted to cry. So OF COURSE my sis in law and my wife forgot that we had a party going onn with 30 guests and just made it all about get my niece to calm down. I LOVE HER so much but this year she WONT be coming Im working too hard to make this party AWESOME

KIDS HAVE TONS OF TIME being the center of attention. Let the parents unwind!


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## Zillah (Sep 14, 2008)

v_gan said:


> #1 They annoy me. #2 They're gross. #3 I don't want their grubby little hands on all my stuff.


I love it!


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## Tonguesandwich (Jan 8, 2008)

Children are to be brought as food only!


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## HeatherEve1234 (Sep 5, 2008)

I'm super blatant about no kids (in most of my life, as well as on the invites). This year the invites say "Sorry, no kids - those in utero permitted, I suppose." (I'll be 7 months pregnant)


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## rokzmom (Oct 23, 2009)

I have three kids. We do trick-or-treating for them. A neighbor does a Halloween party for them. OUR Halloween party invite? It reads: "Adults Only" There is a time and place for kids, and our party is not it! Our start time isn't until 8:30 which allows most of our friends plenty of time to feed their kids, put them to bed and get the babysitter situated. Our kids are put to bed up in the attic that night. This one is for us. Not them. And that's okay. Hope you have fun!


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## colmmoo (Jul 23, 2005)

It's totally fine. I bet most parents would prefer that anyway. They really enjoy themselves more when they don't have to keep an eye on their kids at a party.


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## obcessedwithit (Jul 13, 2009)

I've never had kids invited to the party, too much adult stuff going on and the under age drinking is a big issue with me....I have however had a kids evening where my friends with kids can bring them over and let them see all the stuff setup, usually anight or so before the party..no itis not rude and your friends should understand


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## GhostMagnet (Jul 14, 2009)

There was a time when parents didn't have their kids with them 24/7. When parents had regular "adult time" and getting a baby-sitter was no big deal. I always have adults only Halloween parties. I think it's best all around. The party atmosphere totally changes when you have children around. It sucks to have to worry about it, I know.


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## kevin242 (Aug 30, 2005)

I can understand if you don't have any children of your own, I do have children (they are niether gross or annoying BTW). As much as I hate to be the lone voice of dissention here, I would probably pass up a party that my kids aren't welcome to. Perhaps its that most of my friends have kids and we do really fun Halloween parties every year. 
Besides, I'd much rather have my kids around to entertain me instead of some stuffy grownups complaining about their job, politics, taxes... or _whatever_


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## rockplayson (Jun 7, 2008)

I don't think it's rude at all. I mean after all it's your party you should enjoy it just as much as the next person. I also think alot of parents would like to have a night to themselves and relax with out the kids getting in their way.


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## Edward (Sep 24, 2010)

We are hosting a party for over 100 people, and children are NOT being invited simply because its our party and we only want adults present. We love children, but not at this party, besides, we heard they taste like chicken. 

Just a joke, don't get excited!

You can and should invite who you want and don't want, your paying for everything.


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## yummum29 (Oct 22, 2008)

I have kids, love kids and love Halloween with kids. Our party, however is NOT for kids! On Halloween day, we go kid friendly. The n ight of our party will be adults only. Not one of our 30 couples invited (all have kids) want to bring their children. It is their night. If you use this thread as your guide, very very few would ever be offended.


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## Halloweenfan (Sep 18, 2008)

^My only thing with the only adults party, is where are the kids going to go? You really shouldn't leave them at home alone on Halloween night unless you send them to their grandma's house.


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## Caitsith (Sep 1, 2010)

We've been struggling with this question ourselves. Most of our friends and family are married and have children. It can be very difficult to get a sitter on Halloween so we've compromised. We have a house large enough so that we can have the party at one end of the house (extending into the Funhouse basement). The kids have a room at the far end of the housewhere they can play and be put down. Of course at least one adult must sacrifice the adult festivities and one member of each couple must be in a condition to drive unless they plan to stay over. Luckily we have a kind soul that is willing to take one for the team one night a year. We plan to hang blankets as soundproofing (which we also do on "MOVIE NIGHTS" ) to muffle the fun, and the layout of the house allows for this to work sort of.... Ideally everyone getting a babysitter and leaving the kids home would work better but it's just not practical. And besides, the kids generally take part early, wear themselves out, play a little, and for the most part retire fairly early(also learned from MOVIE NIGHT), leaving the adults to ...carry on. The alternative is no party because almost no one will show up or going home very early to take care of the kids.


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